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Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Saturday, July 11, 2009
summer in the park
While waiting for Mama, Papa took you to the nearby park. It was good to see you with a big big smile on your face. I wish Mama could see you with Papa's eyes.
You snuck under the table, so Papa got a photo of you there showing your new panties.....oops..
The look of sheer happiness on your face, Papa wishes Mama had taken just a little time with you to learn and grow together.
Papa loves you.
log, to summer
This will be factual...(at least as much as I can be)
Papa got to see you last Saturday. Mama changed her mind at the last minute , and agreed to 10am pickup. Surprise!! Anyway, Let see what we did. Papa got to bring you to watch Ice Age: Dawn of the dinosaurs. It was a little troubling to see that you were so excited to see Papa, you told papa you didn't need to use the bathroom.....
So.... a big puddle in the toyshop!!! Pee and pee and pee....!! A frantic search for new panties ensued, in the kiddie portion of the department store. Papa had to buy and sneak you out real quick just in case anyone asked about the big pool of water in the toyshop...
You enjoyed the movie but things got downhill from there. Papa took you to another toyshop.
I asked you then whether you wanted to learn how to build a necklace with a kit. You kept saying no, and I asked you to have Mama teach you. The saddest look came across your face, and you said in a small voice that Mama won't teach. You asked me to teach you and offered to follow me home to learn.
SO....Papa got a little pain in the heart and started asking you questions.
"Does Mama play with you?" (this had been asked before) "No....."
"Does Mama bring you around?" "No.."
"Does Mama stay with you?" (test question) "no...Mama is never in the house..." [small voice, looks down on the ground]
"Is Mama [in the house] at night?" "no.."
"Are you alone?" "yes"
"Where does Mama go at night, mergirl?" "Mama go shopping...."
"Every night?" "yes"
"Does Mama dress up?" "yes, she look beautiful...like when the wind in blowing in the hair..."
Mama didn't answer calls to pick you at 5pm that day. Normally she would be shouting and screaming if Papa is even slightly late. Papa called until around 6pm when Mama called. Mama said she needed another 1/2 hour to pick you. Very evasive, subdued and wouldn't answer Papa.
So at 630 Mama came. Looked like she had a bath, sarong decked around the upper body. (to hide hickeys I guess.)
Papa was very angry. Flat out accused Mama of fucking until she forgot you entirely. Mama refused to say no, eyes down, said she had "something to do" but refused to elaborate.
Papa has to take you away from Mama, because you have lost one year of growing up in staying with Mama. You are 4 1/2 now but you behave in so many ways like a 3 1/2 year old toddler. Papa was not good enough to see this until very very recently. Yes you stay with Mama, but she doesn't pay any attention to you and you have not grown any.
Papa has told Mama (by numerous sms, which she has not answered any) that Papa will take custody and raise you. Papa does not want you to grow home alone in a cubicle. Papa will try and give you all the love he can , ok?
Papa got to see you last Saturday. Mama changed her mind at the last minute , and agreed to 10am pickup. Surprise!! Anyway, Let see what we did. Papa got to bring you to watch Ice Age: Dawn of the dinosaurs. It was a little troubling to see that you were so excited to see Papa, you told papa you didn't need to use the bathroom.....
So.... a big puddle in the toyshop!!! Pee and pee and pee....!! A frantic search for new panties ensued, in the kiddie portion of the department store. Papa had to buy and sneak you out real quick just in case anyone asked about the big pool of water in the toyshop...
You enjoyed the movie but things got downhill from there. Papa took you to another toyshop.
I asked you then whether you wanted to learn how to build a necklace with a kit. You kept saying no, and I asked you to have Mama teach you. The saddest look came across your face, and you said in a small voice that Mama won't teach. You asked me to teach you and offered to follow me home to learn.
SO....Papa got a little pain in the heart and started asking you questions.
"Does Mama play with you?" (this had been asked before) "No....."
"Does Mama bring you around?" "No.."
"Does Mama stay with you?" (test question) "no...Mama is never in the house..." [small voice, looks down on the ground]
"Is Mama [in the house] at night?" "no.."
"Are you alone?" "yes"
"Where does Mama go at night, mergirl?" "Mama go shopping...."
"Every night?" "yes"
"Does Mama dress up?" "yes, she look beautiful...like when the wind in blowing in the hair..."
Mama didn't answer calls to pick you at 5pm that day. Normally she would be shouting and screaming if Papa is even slightly late. Papa called until around 6pm when Mama called. Mama said she needed another 1/2 hour to pick you. Very evasive, subdued and wouldn't answer Papa.
So at 630 Mama came. Looked like she had a bath, sarong decked around the upper body. (to hide hickeys I guess.)
Papa was very angry. Flat out accused Mama of fucking until she forgot you entirely. Mama refused to say no, eyes down, said she had "something to do" but refused to elaborate.
Papa has to take you away from Mama, because you have lost one year of growing up in staying with Mama. You are 4 1/2 now but you behave in so many ways like a 3 1/2 year old toddler. Papa was not good enough to see this until very very recently. Yes you stay with Mama, but she doesn't pay any attention to you and you have not grown any.
Papa has told Mama (by numerous sms, which she has not answered any) that Papa will take custody and raise you. Papa does not want you to grow home alone in a cubicle. Papa will try and give you all the love he can , ok?
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
store room
J'VOUDRAIS VOIR TON VISAGE
C'est fou c'que tu m'fais peur
Mon petit bout de vie
Appuyé sur mon coeur
Courageusement blotti
T'as ancré dans ma chair
Ton fragile rafiot
Moi j't'envoie mes rivières
Et j'te secoue d'sanglots
J'ai peur que tu décroches
J'ai peur que tu dérives
Mais plus je te sens proche
Et plus que j'ai peur qu't'arrives
C'est fou c'que tu m'fais peur
Avec ton grand mystère
J't'endends déjà qui pleures
J'me vois déjà m'en faire
J'voudrais voir ton visage
J'te voudrais déjà grand
J'te voudrais déjà sage
Et déjà éloquent
J'ai peur de ton language
Cousu de cris divers
Que j'devrai comme toutes les mères
Décoder sans relâche
C'est fou c'que tu m'fais peur
Mon silencieux copain
Planté comme une fleur
Dans mon précieux jardin
Cet espace de chair
Sans roses ni jonquilles
Réservé au p'tit frère
De ma jolie grande fille
J'voudrais voir ton visage
J'te voudrais déjà grand
J'te voudrais déjà sage
Et déjà éloquent
J'ai peur de ton language
Cousu de cris divers
Que j'devrai comme toutes les mères
Décoder sans relâche
J'ai peur de ce regard que tu poseras sur moi
Quand pour la première fois j'te tiendrai dans mes bras
J'ai peur de ton soleil
J'ai peur de j'ter de l'ombre
Sur ton premier premier réveil
Avec mes humeurs sombres
C'est fou c'que j'me fais peur
Je crie je m'impatiente
Je porte tant d'bonheur
Que ca m'fait mal au ventre
Je me ronge les pouces
Et la panique me frôle
Quand j'pense à ta frimousse
Juchée sur mon épaule
Donne moi du courage
Je deviendrais plus grande
Les femmes sont plus sages
Chaque fois qu'elles enfantent
J'écouterais ton language
Cousu de cris d'enfants
Et comme le font toutes les mères
J'y décoderais "maman"
I want to see your face. I'm putting it here for storage, can't seem to write anything right now
C'est fou c'que tu m'fais peur
Mon petit bout de vie
Appuyé sur mon coeur
Courageusement blotti
T'as ancré dans ma chair
Ton fragile rafiot
Moi j't'envoie mes rivières
Et j'te secoue d'sanglots
J'ai peur que tu décroches
J'ai peur que tu dérives
Mais plus je te sens proche
Et plus que j'ai peur qu't'arrives
C'est fou c'que tu m'fais peur
Avec ton grand mystère
J't'endends déjà qui pleures
J'me vois déjà m'en faire
J'voudrais voir ton visage
J'te voudrais déjà grand
J'te voudrais déjà sage
Et déjà éloquent
J'ai peur de ton language
Cousu de cris divers
Que j'devrai comme toutes les mères
Décoder sans relâche
C'est fou c'que tu m'fais peur
Mon silencieux copain
Planté comme une fleur
Dans mon précieux jardin
Cet espace de chair
Sans roses ni jonquilles
Réservé au p'tit frère
De ma jolie grande fille
J'voudrais voir ton visage
J'te voudrais déjà grand
J'te voudrais déjà sage
Et déjà éloquent
J'ai peur de ton language
Cousu de cris divers
Que j'devrai comme toutes les mères
Décoder sans relâche
J'ai peur de ce regard que tu poseras sur moi
Quand pour la première fois j'te tiendrai dans mes bras
J'ai peur de ton soleil
J'ai peur de j'ter de l'ombre
Sur ton premier premier réveil
Avec mes humeurs sombres
C'est fou c'que j'me fais peur
Je crie je m'impatiente
Je porte tant d'bonheur
Que ca m'fait mal au ventre
Je me ronge les pouces
Et la panique me frôle
Quand j'pense à ta frimousse
Juchée sur mon épaule
Donne moi du courage
Je deviendrais plus grande
Les femmes sont plus sages
Chaque fois qu'elles enfantent
J'écouterais ton language
Cousu de cris d'enfants
Et comme le font toutes les mères
J'y décoderais "maman"
I want to see your face. I'm putting it here for storage, can't seem to write anything right now
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